What I imagine is happening in this picture

"Hey students! It's me, Dean Magleby. I'm just walking up these spiral stairs that don't go to my office. In fact these stairs don't really go to anywhere. Most of the time they just lead to a sign that says 'Exhibition construction in progress. Do not enter.' Come to think of it, what am I even doing here? My office is on the 9th floor of a completely different building. I'm glad that you all fanned out nicely on the stairs. If I were hovering on some sort of magical platform to the side of the stairs, I could probably get all your faces in a picture. Just nobody move while I amaze you all with an impromptu lecture on Family, Health, and/or Social Science."